Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
The feeling are messing with the penis
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Randomize
