one two three fourrrrnication!
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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