wanna go halves on a baby?
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
