I accidentally burped into my bong.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
it's great music for shaving your balls
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
