I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I love having hate sex.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
