covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Randomize
