Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
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