dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
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