Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
wow bdsm is so cute
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
