We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Randomize
