Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize