I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
