I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
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