We're facebook friends in real life
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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