you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
