Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
