fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize
