his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Randomize
