we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Randomize
