Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
