Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
People in love make me want to vomit
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
