Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Randomize
