i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
