Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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