I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
