Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize
