Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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