i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Randomize
