remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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