theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
