im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize