i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
