Reggie can tackle my bush.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
