Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
