I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I have post one night stand depression
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
