we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
