You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize
