Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
they're like a gay fantastic four
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Randomize
