I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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