We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
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