Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
