ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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