Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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