One girl and one boy is just not enough.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
