he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Randomize
