In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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