I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
