If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
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