i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize