Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
